“What does 10-year mean to you?” Kwat.
“Like the candy corn we had in your car, now we are here, the same place, the same time and the only differences is,” me.
The same club where Indira and I used to have fun, I was the super model, the queer, the gay skiny tone to Muscular dancer, the one who wears underwear with full of tourists’ one dollar bill.
“One time a dude gave me 10 dollar and when I saw it, he took it back,” me.
I was in the car with Kwat and he said he is broke so today I am offering him the treat.
We went a cigar bar first.
“Pick one for me,” Kwat.
“Ok,” me.
We went to a Gym bar first and the only differences from the club I used to see him play is that less people.
Kwat and I had not hung out until recently he told me that he wanted me to a project.
“What’s the mission this time?” Me.
“See how they spend their money and then tell me what’s going on, since, I cannot go there,” Kwat.
“You play pool?” Darren.
“No, I only watch pool and analyze whether people push it. There is a rumor that the pool is bowling and the heavy ball cannot lead to the direction that you want,” me.
“I can teach you,” Darren.
“The girl fell in love with you because she started playing pool game, watching one ball gradually moving to a place that you do not want it to be,” Me.
“Wanna go outside and smoke?” sure why not.
I was a bit tipsy and he saw it. That was the third time I saw Darren and the first time was in my bedroom 10 years ago. I just believed he would not recognize me, so when he only briefly talked to me the second time we met our entire life, this year the second time, I thought I could catch him when he only talked to me for one sentence.
No matter who waits for whom a deal is a deal.
I told Kwat that I can exchange for getting dropped for the second charge to perform the same task.
“Darren? I do not believe this dude this rich. He looks familiar but I did not believe so. Maybe now he is,” I answered.
Same gym bar, I went there ten years ago only twice that year. I just felt, it did not have someone I like.
“I rather go online and sort the type, the type at least I can have a bit,” me.
“Yep, and then I was lured,” Darren.
Darren and I were smoking outside while not talking. I was very cautious about my behavior outside but Darren tried to make me believe that the world is still that world.
“So he tried to kiss me but I did not let him but since he was fast so his lip touched just a bit,” me while explaining to someone why I did not cheat.
“So, this weekend I just feel like to play with you. I will go wherever you suggested to go,” me.
And then he took me to a bar, one of my rich exs took me 10 years ago.
The bar is the same location, same name, and the only differences was that, it was a duplicate of the one me and Indira playing. The pole dancing session.
The light is the same, the people is the same, even the bartender is the same.
I thought Indira only hires part time bartender for not spending that much, and then today I realized that, they serve differently. They are part of the construction, to make the customers feel they are in paradise.
I was starring at the pole which I was dancing with a few years ago and then I was looking around, no customer looks familiar, even it is still in NYC.
There are about 3 dancers dancing near one pole and I was thinking what if one of them too good?
There are people walking around with underwear on and I was like, why a strip club does not even make me feel dangerous.
“Let’s play a game,” and then I pulled Darren’s tie and whispered in his ear, “tell me what to do next.”
“Here all the one dollar bill, put them into their underwear,” Darren.
“No, I don’t do that. You go ahead,” Me.
Darren was walking around and I was watching him walking around. At that moment, I just cannot stop thinking, what does it mean to go out with someone to a place like this even,
Or it can be how people presume our relationship. For example, when I was a gogo boy dancer, after one tips, I would look whether there was someone with the person. If there is, I do not move far. But the rule is actually like that, it is more about, a couple come here for fun.
“But they do not do it,” Darren.
“Maybe the money is not thirst enough. If I want more tips, I would do both,” Me.
Darren started acting which made me discriminate him, “I hate rich dude pretending poor. It is even worse than the one who pretends rich since at least the lesson is easier,” after I gave Darren the ticket fee.
“Can I hang your clothes?” Darren.
“Thanks very much,” me.
Darren put three dollars into one boy’s underwear and the he walked back to me.
I still did not know what that mean.
But those three are not my type but if I look closely to one of them, I can train that person.
You can never tell the target what your world is truly are, and then it may scare them away.
“You know when I look at you and I just cannot stop thinking, if I be your nutritionist and the trainer and make you a bodybuilder, whether I would be jealous if you are about to become others’,” me.
Darren put all his clothes on and call a car. We went downstairs together, it was a Honda.
“Are you fucking kidding me…….” me.
Honda is good but it is just not for me.
“Continue,” Darren.
“Basically after I had my PhD and high pay staff, our exs will just say something that I sacrificed our future so I was like ok so now I am a licensed doctor, can I just create one’s future,” me.
“That sounds fun,” Darren.
Time turned to 10 hours ago.
“Ok, now I wanna do it, that one,” I pointed to a guy and I knew it was Matar.
“No,” Darren.
“Why not? You told me I can do it and now this one I have a little bit appetite and you say no,” Me.
And then I turned to his friend who definitely is my granduncle’s son and an artist. Yes, criminals can have normal gay friends.
“He said I could do it before now he said no,” I was with them in the middle of the club dancing floor and while dancing and talking.
The dance was a bit complicated since I knew more how to move in a club.
“I was just go there, put the bill and then come back!” Darren.
I was thinking how come there is no follow up argument.
Indeed, cannot show him that, only tan skin fit dude I would take a look with underwear on him and if he approached me, I made him to hell.
“Hey dude, it does not even feel derogatory no more even when I saw you there,” I called Matar the second day.
“Why is that you bitch with a new dude,” Matar.
“Because it is a new era now and the patrons are more culture even. When they touch the boys, I either was thinking the person is a tourist or not even very sexual,” Me.
“What it should be?” Darren.
“Like the patron needs to feel he is touching God while putting the bill into boys’ underwear,” Me.

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